We are 45 days away from the biggest scariest move of my whole life. We are about to pack up all three of our beautiful babies, a cat and a big lovably dumb dog and fly to Germany where we will live for the next 3 years. I am very excited (aufregend) and very stressed (stressig). We prayed over this change every step of the way. There were many unknowns and everything was up in the air for a while. But we got our answer and now we prepare to completely change our lives. I don't know what to think, how to feel, what to plan for. I don't know what the weather is like, how our cell phones will work, what kind of house we'll live in, how to interact casually with locals... I have heard is very different. I don't know how to enroll my oldest into a new school... when to do that or how to do anything. I'm so scared of the future but I also don't know that there is anything to be scared of.
People keep telling me that I have to take advantage of being over there while we're in Europe and see as much as I can while there. But that thought freaks me out. I don't speak any other language besides English and even that I don't speak clearly enough to be understood. I just feel like I'm going to try to do what I can, take a few opportunities, but mostly just try to survive. Traveling with three little kids just to another state is stressful enough, let alone another country where they don't speak the same language. I do want to take my train-lover on some train rides, and I promised my oldest Duck that we would try to see Paris. But other than that, I'm going to stick pretty close to my bubble. At least that's how I feel about it right now. We'll see once I get there.
My husband is actually doing a new job for the USAF, with slightly different responsibilities so there's a pretty big possibility that I will be alone a lot more. At least 4 times a year, if not more. He will be deploying and going on trainings pretty regularly. I'm not looking forward to that, but I will cross each bridge as I come to it. I'm so nervous. I don't know what I don't know. I just wish I had someone to talk to who's been there and knows how to do this. I've never even been on a rotator before. And I'm worried about my dog because he didn't actually get one of the very limited pet spots on the plane, so I have to send him out later on a different flight, or possibly with my parents when they come to visit shortly after I get there. And then I have to fly back all by myself in November for one of my very best friends' wedding... So I have to be there for that, and flying alone freaks me out, especially from another country that doesn't speak my language!!!! I don't know how to do any of this stuff. Lord be with me. I'm so fearful.
I am learning Deutsch to try to prepare for this change. And I do know that a lot of German people speak English. It doesn't change the fear though. Not many people do something like this and no one really has any advice for me. Not in my family, anyway. I just have to do it and when I'm on the other side, be proud of myself for surviving.
